Ode To Excel

A finer spreadsheet, there never was
Your rows; yours columns; your formulas
Your data validation limits my input
And your auditing toolbar serves, when there’s errors afoot
At pivoting data, you have no equal
And your Find command always helps me to seek well
Styles are the best when I want to format
Autocorrect rescues me when my fingers are fat
There is but one thing that would send me to heaven
If only I could type in column 257

9 Comments

  1. Graham says:

    How about some haiku, Dick?

    Ev’ry day I read
    Dick’s Daily Dose of Excel
    And J-Walk’s Blog too.

  2. Doug Glancy says:

    While with your thoughts I fully agree
    and your rhymes are not tortured to an unreasonable degree
    I’ll posit that not every Tom, Dick or Peter
    would go to such lengths to murder the meter

  3. Bene says:

    Hey Dick- love the color green that I saw yesterday- This blue makes me feel washed out! Anyway this site seems really helpful and user friendly- I just don’t have any idea as to what you are talking about. bene

  4. Dick says:

    Thanks Bene. I liked the green too, but I see green everyday at work and I’m quite sick of it. Maybe I’ll try Texas Longhorn Orange.

  5. Paul Hoch says:

    What would truly send me to heaven,
    would be a row 65537.

  6. Jamie Collins says:

    “What would truly send me to heaven,
    would be a row 65537″

    But to what sort of lengths would you go:
    have you ever considered FoxPro?

  7. Jamie Collins says:

    “Maybe I’ll try Texas Longhorn Orange”

    Ah, the color with no rhyme.

  8. p. g. woodhouse says:

    Dick, you went first, you have only yourself to blame.

    Ode To Excel Redux

    When last I looked Excel had crashed
    It’s hourglass cursor spinning

    What had I done, is all lost
    or was a dll just missing

  9. Jon Peltier says:

    >>“Maybe I’ll try Texas Longhorn Orange”

    >Ah, the color with no rhyme.

    My daughter’s favorite:

    Roses are red
    Violets are blue
    Some poems rhyme
    But this one doesn’t

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